The First Drink Problem may not have the philosophic cachet or be as daunting as the celebrated Chicken-Egg Conundrum, but it does seem to linger. It appears that the question has now been definitively settled (I’ll get to that in a minute), but noodling the problem has led me to the hypothesis that the main distinction to be drawn between these two ancient beverages lies mainly in the relative durability — or lack of it — of their source materials.
You see, wine stuff is supremely perishable. A ripe grape whose protective skin has been compromised (broken by rough handling or an industrious insect) will immediately be set upon by other ravenous fauna, some at the microbial level (yeasts; bacteria; molds) some, like wasps and birds, on the macro scale. Under such conditions, fermentation and rot get moving spontaneously and quickly. Even healthy fruit can’t be kept for long without deteriorating.
Beer stuff, on the other hand presents just the opposite problem, since cereal grains refuse to ferment on their own and must be driven to it. With a view to converting their starches to fermentable sugars they are first sprouted, then cracked and soaked in water to produce a sugar-rich liquid. Finally, you have something present for yeasts to work on. Both beer and wine require human intervention, but fruit wine shortcuts the process. It hits the ground running.
While both cereal and fruit harvests must be accomplished in a single burst of hard (often communal) labor, grain, unlike grape juice, can be safely stored for long periods of time. (Think here of how the biblical Joseph prepared for Egypt’s seven years of famine he knew were coming by creating a strategic reserve of wheat and barley.)
Another difference: Unlike winemaking — but similar to bread baking — beer brewing was a daily affair, carried out in the home and at household scale with simple tools, drawing only so much grain from the store as is required in each instance. In the ancient Near East beer was routine, an everyday consumable (schoolboys carried it to class; workmen to the job site) while wine was an expensive, exotic beverage consumed mainly by royals and their well-heeled hangers-on. While it seems clear that wine, the original self-starter, must have gotten the jump on beer by some millennia, when we return to the question of which of these old rivals enjoys absolute historical priority, I’m afraid the answer is . . . neither.
The late Professor Patrick McGovern at the University of Pennsylvania demonstrated conclusively years ago that our first intentional encounter with alcohol came via a not particularly discriminating mash-up of whatever we could induce to ferment (honey, berries, grapes, tree fruits and saps) along with some flavorings, all done in a single, primitive ceramic pot.
In other words, that first drink was neither beer nor wine, but a cocktail, of sorts: the most old fashioned Old Fashioned of them all.
This week in the wine corner . . . .
THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 6, 3-6 PM – GO AHEAD, HAVE A COW
2017 Meinklang, Burgenland White, $16.95 #getfreshwith me
2017 Meinklang, Burgenland Rosé of Pinot Noir Frizzante, $21.95 #popstar
FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 7, 3-6 PM – EVERYBODY INTO THE COOL
NV Domaines des Terres Blanches “Ancestral Brut,” $24.95 #farmsteadbubbly
2016 Tiberio Trebbiano d’Abruzzo Bianco, $18.95 #antiquestop
2014 Domaine Saladin “Loi” Côtes du Rhone, $19.95 #myrhonetruelove